26 Jan 10Letters.app Project Dissolves

In a disappointing turn of events for the fledgling project, sources indicate that the effort to to create a more robust alternative to Apple’s Mail.app called Letters.app has dissolved over “irreconcilable differences”.

“The egos involved were simply too big,” said a source involved in the project who declined to be identified.

“You can’t build software by committee,” the source said. “Or, in this case, by prima donna convention. There were too many flamboyant cooks in the kitchen.”

Despite John Gruber being named project leader, the Daring Fireball auteur felt continually nitpicked by back-seat drivers.

“Nobody sees my vision!” screamed Gruber, stabbing out his clove cigarette, taking a sip from a $10 beer in a can and adjusting his beret. “Only I know which fonts are appropriate! Only I know which menu items go where! Only I know which controls are controlliest! And I refuse to have my ideas, my concepts, my passion be questioned by Philistines!

“It is as if you asked Stanley Kubrick to direct a dinner theater production! Or asked Joe Torre to manage the Nationals! It cannot be done!”

Others associated with project, meanwhile, blamed Gruber himself for its failure.

“I am an artiste!” cried Panic Software’s Cabel Sasser, flinging his scarf around his neck. “If anyone knows about making softwares that are beautiful to the touch, it is I, not this pixel-pushing lout of a man whose personal grooming is also suspect!”

Most simply blamed everyone but themselves.

Imbéciles!” exclaimed Brent Simmons, inexplicably speaking in French. “Je ne peux pas travailler avec ces imbéciles!”

Technical lead Gus Mueller has reportedly taken the existing source code – currently nothing more than five lines of comments and one IBAction – and renamed it CrunchMail.app. Mueller hopes to have a working product of his own personal design some time next year, but right now is more concerned with fulfilling the obligations of his tell-all book deal with O’Reilly.